They say St. Patrick drove the snakes out of Ireland. I wonder if he could do that for Congress.

Topic: AGE, ATTITUDE, FAMILY

Events: ST. PATRICK'S DAY

I was going to quit all my bad habits for the new year, but then I remembered that nobody likes a quitter.

Topic: ATTITUDE, FAMILY, FRIENDSHIP

Events: NEW YEAR

When my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn't hire stupid people.

Topic: ATTITUDE, MEN, WORK

Events:

Sometimes we expect more from others because we would be willing to do that much more for them.

Topic: ATTITUDE, FRIENDSHIP, LIFE

Events:

The problem with trouble shooting is that trouble shoots back.

Topic: ATTITUDE, FIGHTING, LIFE

Events:

Diet Day #1 - I removed all the fattening food from my house. It was delicious.

Topic: ATTITUDE, FAT, FOOD, SARCASTIC, SCHOOL

Events:

I grew a beard thinking it would say "Distinguished Gentleman." Instead, turns out it says, "Senior Discount, Please!"

Topic: AGE, ATTITUDE

Events:

I hope when I inevitably choke to death on gummy bears people just say I was killed by bears and leave it at that.

Topic: ATTITUDE, DEATH, FOOD, PEOPLE, SARCASTIC

Events:

I asked my North Korean friend how it was there, he said he couldn't complain.

Topic: ATTITUDE, COMMUNICATION, LIFE, POLITICAL, SARCASTIC

Events:

A recent study has found that women who carry a little extra weight live longer than the men who mention it.

Topic: ATTITUDE, FAT, LIFE, MEN, WOMEN

Events:

Result:   1-10 of 10
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