Last night I got so drunk that when I got to the bottom of the stairs, I took off my shoes, coat, top, trousers and underwear
If money doesn't grow on trees why do banks have branches? 🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂
What do you get when you cross a snoman and a vampire? Frost bite.
What food diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%? Wedding Cake!
Weddings and funerals are the same because I love going but I don't want them to be about me.
So apparently RSVP'ing back to a wedding invite 'maybe next time' isn't the correct response.
Do you love me because I am beautiful or I am I beautiful because you love me?
And in her smile I see something more beautiful than the stars.
Help! This is my first time cooking for Thanksgiving. The turkey's been in the oven for two hours, and it's still running around!
There's always something to be thankful for on Thanksgiving. Even if it's just not being a turkey.